CURRENTLY BROWSING : Conversations with myself

DEAR SELF, IT’S TIME TO DECOMPRESS

What you mean give myself a break I have bills due. I want to find a man so I can drop these babies, I'm not getting any younger. I have to find the perfect job and bring in the bucks.  If I don't do it, who else will? I feel like we spend so much of our time in a hurry or always having our minds preoccupied with something. When do we rest? I mean, yes we may get sleep, but when we are up, our minds are going a mile a minute. We have so much to keep us entertained, but find it hard to unwind because of all the stimulation. Anything you want to watch is on your jailbroke fire stick, cable tv, YouTube and Netflix. Then there is social media. Instagram is always popping and then there is family and friend drama on Facebook, sure to keep you entertained. I personally feel as if my attention span has gotten so short, that I don't know how to be bored anymore I can't even watch a little tv without having my phone in my hand. I am ready to switch my mode of entertainment as soon as a little boredom creeps in. It has gotten so bad that my 8 year old son has taken notice and requests that I put my phone down to spend time with him. How many times do we pick up our phones in a day? I feel like my brain is screaming for a rest. But so much of my work is on a phone! How do we strike a healthy balance? We feel left out if we aren't partaking in certain things. The world is moving pretty fast and no one wants to get lost, but please remember that it is ok to have a seat. To know that you are beat and tired, to recognize it and do something about it takes maturity. We have to be in charge of our sanity and stop looking to things to fill a void. Especially our generation we are chasing so many things such as materialism, an image, status etc and at the end of the day those things really don't matter. We want our lives to be as "normal" yet better than others, so we put so much pressure on ourselves to achieve it. Men don't worry about marriage as young and as often as women do! We don't want to be over 30 and childless and manless because we know that people are going to start asking dumb ass questions. But take the pressure of others off yourself. Decompress and live this life as best as possible. Find what ways work best for you. Whether it's exercise, prayer, dance, writing, singing or sleeping the day away enjoy the time you set aside for yourself to release. There are no definite rules for your life. Chill and release. Muah!

#Issa Confession: He Didn’t Like My Natural Hair and I Still Dated Him

He was sophisticated. I was natural. He didn't like that shit lol. I met, let's call him Brandon like his real name is. Fuck him lol. He was an older, professional guy and had me on a damn thin ass string that I wouldn't let break. He was hot and cold. He would go away, I would get sad. Always trying to think of ways to get him back. *Facepalms for 1 hr* He would come back around and I would make sure that I was looking as delicious as my budget afforded. I would go buy new panties, just in case some ish went down lol and make sure my hair was on point. I was soon to find out he was very particular about hair.  In the midst of the "off-season" when I wasn't on his roster lol, I cut off my hair. A sweet little 22-year-old with a TWA (teeny-weeny afro). I was so proud! I felt liberated from my perm and could do whatever with my hair. Brandon calls a few weeks later. Whatsup? Nothing. You coming over? *Throws attitude with him first* Yes lol I get over to his house, yes, I know, and he looks at my hair with an almost disgust. You are natural, you cut your hair? Yes, do you like it? Uhhhhhhh……. Why didn't I leave then? Oh, I know why, teehee lol So once again, the off-season came early. He called a couple of weeks later and asked to see me. Cool, I can do that. Mind you my self-esteem is somewhere in the sewer beneath my house lol. Brandon asked me this question as a sort of prerequisite before seeing him: "Do you still have your hair in that afro?" *I touch my growing fro like a pregnant woman touches her belly. But its mine? I am natural. It's my hair. It grew out of my head.* No, I don't have my hair natural. It is straightened. It's not so much the hair. I wanted to see him. In my mind that was bae, and he was dangling me. How did I let myself stoop so damn low. I was willing to lie about who I am to be with someone who wasn't choosing me regardless if that shit was in an afro or wet and wavy. We set a date to meet, I immediately scheduled an appointment with the Dominicans. Date time comes, he never calls. Ha! Universe had a lesson for my ass. First of all, never alter yourself to appease to someone else. However, there is a difference between making yourself appealing to others which is fine. But it is when you are not being true to yourself that it becomes an issue. When you would go to great lengths to please someone who can give a rats ass. Secondly, why wasn't he dropped sooner? I felt like he was a rarity. He was special. That doting should have been extended to my damn self. Been there, not going back. Muah!

Why Being More Mindful Is In Vogue

I have the tendency to snap. I don't mean snap and be on one of those episodes on the Oxygen Channel, but just to lose my cool when it really didn't warrant that reaction. I could be thinking of other things at time and just take it out on whomever. Not in a bad way, but also not in a cool way. One way that I've learned to combat that is through meditation, more in particular, a guided mindful mediation. In mindful meditation, you practice breathing exercises and listen for a little bell that alerts you to be present in the moment. I first learned of mindful meditation after practicing just regular meditation. Not to confuse you as meditation's purpose is to quiet the mind and bring you to a present state, but there are meditations for different purposes also. I've used mediation for anxiety, fear or positive affirmations, but the main gist of it is being mindful of the moment. Be present in your life and the day-to-day of it. Life is passing us by at great speed and we are always trying to jump to the destination, forgetting the journey. When you are present in the moment, your focus is there. You are not thinking about something that happened yesterday and you are not concerned with tomorrow. You are thinking about now. The ever fleeting moment. This is especially important as being a mom, a lot of your patience is tested. My child requires the present me. Not the stressed out over the future me or ruminating over the past me. He needs me now and being an awesome now mom. This works of course if you don't have any kids. Use it in other relationships and watch the relationships improve. Give the gift of yourself. There is no time like the present. Muah!

About Me

Hi! My name is Robinette.

Founder & Editor

I am not a role model… just a messenger. Since I can remember, I have been in love with helping myself to do better and helping others.

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